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# Guest Blog entry # 1: "Battling the Confidence Monster" by Jennifer Shattuck
- URL: https://www.myvirtualeventingcoach.com/guest-blog-1-battling-the-confidence-monster/
- Published: 2012-09-11T03:23:00.000Z
- Updated: 2026-02-09T17:23:49.000Z
- Author: Administrator
- Tags: Blog, #Import 2026-01-20 00:55

### Battling the Confidence Monster  
  
I loath him.
  
  
I despise him.   
  
  
He’s an evil, sneaky,  
beady-eyed beast that lives in every nook and cranny of your mind. He’s 50, 100 years old. He makes the  
villagers pick up pitchforks and torches and march the square stomping and  
yelling; “Burn him!” “Tear him from limb to limb!” “Run him to the woods!”  
  
  
He’s patient. He’s  
persistent. He sits and waits for the perfect chance to rattle your brain with  
thoughts of fear and doubt. He listens for you to fall asleep the night before  
a show and then whispers *boo* in your  
ear. Not loud, not even loud  
enough for anyone else to hear, just barely loud enough to wake you up and  
question your sanity . . . again.  
  
  
He hides behind the Swedish  
oxer and under the Trakhener. He lays flat in the bottom of the beginner novice  
ditch. In fact, legend says every time a rider stares into a ditch he grows  
another horn. He lifts the Novice coop  
just a wee bit higher, and the Prelim drop just a tad steeper. No level or  
course is safe from this gremlin. He feeds off the self-doubt that comes after  
a fall or a refusal (but falls are his favorite).   
  
  
This weekend I will battle  
that monster.   
  
  
I will arm myself with the pure  
thoughts of success and completion, and put the memories of my fall behind me.  
I will defend against his attacks with confidence and zest and really, really,  
really good coaching. I will, *perhaps*,  
take a swill of grog on the battlefield.   
  
  
And when he calls, I will say  
“Sorry, I believe you have the wrong number”.   
  
  
And **that** will make me smile.  
  
[![](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Zw3gVwkkI20/UEny-km4EtI/AAAAAAAAAEg/-fUrmhhtbTY/s320/IMG_0047.jpg)](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Zw3gVwkkI20/UEny-km4EtI/AAAAAAAAAEg/-fUrmhhtbTY/s1600/IMG%5F0047.jpg?ref=myvirtualeventingcoach.com)
  
  
Jennifer Shattuck @ http://buildingthegrove.blogspot.com/